Posts Tagged ‘poop’

Mom has been cooking my food lately instead of feeding me the store-bought wet food and treats. She still feeds me doggy dry food, which I hate, but I guess I’ll eat it if the chicken she makes me is mixed in with it. Yesterday she ran out of the homemade chicken goop so she had to use the store-bought wet food. It didn’t sit well with my stomach. In fact, it was horrible to my intestines. I had the worst diarrhea. It was so bad that I couldn’t hold it anymore so I diarrhea’d all over the carpet and the rugs even though the hardwood floor was only 1 foot away from me. Yay for ruining the expensive rug! And best of all, I diarrhea’d all over it in three spots, and it was soaking into the rug since mom left for work.. eight hours! HAHA! But I don’t usually have accidents in the house. This is the first time in 10 years.. pretty good. And I couldn’t hold it for eight hours. Mom was nice and didn’t spank me. Next time feed me the homemade chicken slop!

xx,
Oakie

Total blue balled! Mama wasn’t home to greet me after uncle picked me up from the kennel. I haven’t seen her in a week! Where the heck is she? At least I’m not at the kennel anymore, and I’m glad I have a backyard to run around in and a house to play with my toys in. I had diarrhea today. What the heck where those ladies feeding me? I made a big stinky loud squirty fart on my uncle as I pooped. It was fun!

xx,
Oakie

Guess what?! Chicken butt! Okay, guess what again? Chicken fin! Just kidding, that doesn’t even make sense! But really, guess what?? Mama took me out on a long walk again! She skipped out on her work out so we went on a nice walk. While mama is getting fat, I am getting skinny!! Ooh I’m gonna look so sexy this summer all slimmed down in my swim trunks! I made two big poopies on the walk! And then just now after my nightly bathroom break, I burped like a dirty old man when mama was taking the harness off me. Hehe I’m funny!!

Toodles,
Oakie

It was rainy and thundery this evening when mama came home. I was so scared of the thunder I didn’t even want to pee, but mom nudged me so I tinkled under the tree. But there was no way I was gonna poop! I put my tail between my legs and ran for the back door! I wouldn’t even eat my delicious dinner because I was so scared. But mom sat on the floor next to my dish and hand fed me a few bites so I’d finish the bowl. I’m glad she did that because I was honnngry! We just went out for my nightly poo, and I didn’t want to pee this time either, but I put on a brave face and did my business. But that was it.. I wanted to go back in! Mom knew I had to go #2 (because I didn’t go earlier and because I ate a big dinner!) so after we made a few circles in the backyard, I popped a squat and pooped a big poopy!!! I was so happy I was done and we went back inside the house! Now it’s sleepy time for me!

Goodnight!
Oakie

Yippee Kai Yay! I watched Lost today with mom! I got to see Jacob and The Man in Black as babies! TWIN babies! Aww so cute! I love babies! And then The Man in Black turned into smoke and died! Aww I hate dying! But the worst part was the MiB killing his mama! Wha WHAT?! Who would ever do such an evil deed?!?! Oh, right, I almost killed my mama when I tripped her down the stairs, but it wasn’t on purpose! I love you, mama! Then after the show, we went out for my poo, and I usually poo in silence, but today I made a wet bean fart squirt when I pooped. It made mom laugh. But I didn’t laugh. I just looked at her, wondering why she giggled at my fart.

xx,
Oakie

Welcome to another LOST Tuesday! I sat on mama’s lap as the hour rolled by. Here I am looking at Sawyer. Who thinks his abs are as wonderful as I do? I mean wha?? No silly, I’m not in love with Sawyer, I’m in love with Kate. Yep.. Kate who can’t make up her mind between Sawyer and Jack. Pick both.. they’re both dreamy! I mean huh wha.. did I just say that? And who else cried when Jin and Sun were united? Oh.. not me. I don’t cry. I just whimper. By then I was ready to jump off mama’s lap and find my bone. I can’t sit still for an hour.. or 5 minutes.

Smell ya later!
Oakie

PS- Besides watching LOST today, I took 2 very solid poopoos and am ready for my 3rd poop before I go to bed in a couple of hours. Yay me!

Ugh! Mom gave me a bath today! Gross! I hate baths! Well, I sort of diarrhea’d all over myself so she had to bathe me. But it’s not really my fault.. it’s hard to keep your bottom clean passing poop soup when your butt is completely covered in fur. I mean come on, gimme a break! Anyway, I’m not the one who fed me fruit. I had no idea it would make my stool all yucky and watery. Oh well, I guess I’m all clean now. I smell like watermelon. No, I didn’t eat more fruit. Mom used girly watermelon scented shampoo on me. I’m still manly though.. I pooed on myself, remember?

Oakie out.

Whaddup, dawg? I like to sport my cap sideways sometimes to express my wild side. I think it makes me look cool and somewhat of a hooligan. You see that green toy in the photo? Yeah, I destroyed it. And then I ate parts of it, and it got stuck in my poop-shoot and mom had to pull it out my butt and I cried and it was such a big mess. Yeah, that part was not that cool, but it was fun tearing it up and eating it. But I guess in the end it wasn’t too worth it.. I had to take a bath after mom pulled the chewed up toy out my butt and got poo all over my behind. It was pretty gross.

Smell ya later,
Oakie

Bonjour! I am so hippity hop happy to be home and not in the kennel! Today I ran around the house freely, I ate three meals instead of two, I had some treats, I took a few dumps, I ran around the house some more, I played with my toys, I threw all my toys all over the house and made a mess, napped for 6 hours, I ran around some more, and I barked at birds and squirrels! What a wonderfully fun and productive day! I wish everyday were like this. Oh wait, everyday IS like this when I’m at home! La vie est belle.

Au Revoir,
Oakie

I had a fun and exciting day today! First, mom and I went on a long walk this morning where I made three nice poopies. Then we hopped into the car and drove through the car wash! My first time! It was scary!!! We drove through a dark tunnel– it was so loud. Then a whole bunch of water sprayed on the windows.. ugh!! I hate the sight of water when it’s not contained in my water bowl! And to top it off, big scary looking arms came down and hit at the windows. I didn’t like it at all, but I couldn’t look away either. I cowered in my seat, scooting closer to mommy. I was so glad when it was over.. car ride back home! I love looking out the window as we drive down the roads. My spit covers the entire inside of the passenger seat. It makes it blurry and hard to see out the window, but mom lets me lick and spit all over the window anyway ’cause she’s cool like that (she’s the coolest mommy ever).

To top the night off, a bunch of aunties and uncles came over to play fetch with me. I was so excited I almost vomited. And now I am super pooped. I’m going to call it a night and bid you all a good evening.

Sweet dreams,
Oakie